Why David Bowie is a Badass: A Beginner's Guide

In honour of my current roll with David Bowie, here's a list of reasons why I find Ziggy's alter-ego deliciously divine:

• I can only imagine how completely otherworldly (alien, if you'd rather) he must have seemed in the 1970s. That his musical ability outshines his pioneering androgyny is the first and most important part of why David Bowie is a badass. He's damn good.

• Back to the androgyny, though. It's fantastic. He's a gorgeous piece of art, really. Blurring the lines between all the opposites I can think of. Male/Female, Human/Nonhuman, Good/Evil...et cetera.

• It's great when someone has something strikingly unique about them. Just like I love Paul Weller's unexpected soul and Peter Murphy's stammer, I adore David Bowie's eyes. In case you haven't noticed, one of them doesn't constrict. He had "spaceman" built in to his appearance through accident at a young age and he has embraced it. Sexy. 

• He's left handed (and those eyes are blue).

• Whether or not you're a David Bowie fan doesn't matter, you know pretty much every song he's ever released. (See next point for some examples)

• He reminds me of Bob Dylan a lot in that some of his songs are more known for the other people who did them. For example: "All the Young Dudes" seems like a Mott the Hoople song. Partly because it is. But Bowie wrote it and has his own version. And who hasn't done a version of "Heroes?" The Wallflowers did my favourite version. (Noel Gallagher's is beautiful as well. Just saying.) Not to mention "Ziggy Stardust" as done by Bauhaus. Imitation proves excellence to a degree, don't you agree?

• He came at a great time for being the type he was. The 1969 Moon Landing coincides with "Space Oddity" and he continued the space theme for, well, forever.

• There are a million different versions of this man. Ziggy Stardust was only one of his make-up jobs. There was also Aladdin Sane, the Thin White Duke, and, possibly, somewhere in there, David Jones. He's been recreating fashion and style for decades. *Insert the infamous lightning bolt here.*

• He's also been making music for decades. This man has 26 studio albums. And, if he weren't one of the most recognisable voices on the planet, it'd be hard to tell that the man who wrote Aladdin Sane is the same man who did Earthling. 

• Acting. David Bowie acts. Of course I very much enjoyed watching him play Thomas in The Man Who Fell to Earth--and good God damn if everybody doesn't know about Jareth the Goblin King--but he's also played roles like Nikola Tesla in The Prestige and Pontius Pilate in The Last Temptation of Christ. No, I am not fucking with you.

• I restate my respect for anyone who has been in a relationship with the same person for longer than a decade. Iman and David have been married since 1992. Not sure how long they've been together, but there you have it.

• This is one of the greatest albums ever written. If only for influential prowess alone. I have a different preference, but, hey, who hasn't listed this as a reason they became a musician? It's a complete story:

• He uses complicated guitar chords in his songs. It's not all Em C G D (Though all of those are in "Space Oddity" now that I think about it) like a lot of musicians of the time used. These are things I had to actually look up to play.

• He's inspired some of my very favourite musicians. He's also inspired some of my least favourite musicians, so this point is slightly off, but the whole reason I actually got in to Bowie past the greatest-hits juncture was because he was constantly referenced in the music and writings of some of the bests. Examples include Joy Division, The Cure, and Bauhaus to go with the themes of this blog thusfar. But also virtually everyone else.

• He's just cool. I mean, this man can go out for a bagel and look cool doing it. Even when he was lanky and awkward and going cockney during interviews, he was cool. This doesn't mean cocaine is cool, but Mr. Jones sure is.

• ...even though sometimes you might question his coolness and wonder if it is in fact "incredible dorkiness."
• 

• And, lastly, he's still doing it. He just had an album out in 2013. I haven't listened to it yet out of fear and thus cannot give you an opinion yet, but it does exist. 

So, fantastic job, David Bowie, you've been glorious since before I even knew what "glorious" meant. 

Keep your electric eye on me, Babe. Put your ray gun to my head. Press your space face close to mine, Luv. Freak out in a moonage daydream oh yeah. 

Throbbing Gristle or "The Weirdest Moment of My Life"

I have to express somewhere what happened to me when I discovered this thing called Throbbing Gristle. Since it appears on the surface to be music, I think this is a good platform to give it a go. 

What is Throbbing Gristle? 

Well, colloquially in 1970s northern English prostitution culture, this means erect penis. However, it was also used to name the group of very serious artists lead by Genesis P-Orridge (Now Genesis Breyer P-Orridge). Cosey Fanni Tutti, Peter "Sleazy" Christopherson, and Chris Carter were the other members involved. That I said "very serious artists" is, in a way, cheeky because they were such psychedelic Dada artists that seriousness is kind of a paradox, but I must say that they were. Super serious.

It started with performance art like taking twenty four hours to cross a room and stripping sex down to it's most deranged forms and performing that spectacle. Then it evolved in to audible performance art. But, instead of having a band--as it was decided instruments are lifeless soulless pieces of nothing--this group created something that has since been dubbed "industrial" music. It's the mechanical sound of industry and scum.

So, strapped with instruments, amplifiers, and jars of bloody excrement for Genesis to consume before shows so s/he could vomit it on to the audience at will, they started making noise. To the layman, they were a band.

I've heard of industrial music. Isn't Nine Inch Nails industrial?

Sort of. Drum machines and electronic noise are the backbone of this turn from technical-skill rock music as far as I can tell; and Trent Reznor is good at taking out the rock and roll instruments. But Throbbing Gristle is so much more than just electronic noise. They encapsulated the actual literal sound of terror. And it's because of that that I can't let them pass by unmentioned.

How I discovered the sound of horror.

I mentioned that I read Peter Hook's autobiography Unknown Pleasures: Inside Joy Division. I also mentioned that post-punk music is my obsession right now. Well all over my sources of information, Throbbing Gristle is mentioned. Hooky must have talked about them a hundred times in his book and Love and Rockets mentioned something about them and they keep popping up on my sidebar suggestions on YouTube; so I decided to just give them a listen and find out what was so very special about them.

The first "song" I came across was called "Slug Bait."

I was expecting something dark and creepy but this is on another level. The most obvious evidence are the lyrics. The words tell the story of climbing in to a pregnant woman's window; making her husband eat his own testicles; cutting her baby out of her stomach; biting it's head off; and then killing it (redundant point as the head has already been removed, but I digress) while the woman bleeds out. All to the phrase "Slug bait. Can't wait."

But, on top of the words--even if you couldn't hear what s/he was saying--there is a sound that is best explained by saying it's exactly what that situation would sound like. The calm ambiance of night interrupted by shrill insanity and robotic evil will of madness muffling the screams. I study serial murder as a strange hobby. I've read the books, seen the crime scene photos and, like a detective, have viewed it rather scientifically. But this brought me right back to Earth. It scared me. 

I could not stop listening. I kept going, listening to gems like "Hamburger Lady" and "Discipline" and feeling every bit more and more unnerved and sick. It was awful.

God damn if that's not powerful stuff! I mean, I was disgusted, frightened, and facing futile mortality there listening to this. I was incredibly uncomfortable. I was affected! I want to roll my eyes because this all makes me think of what would have happened if Andy Warhol were a serial killer (and Andy Warhol is a concept I despise) but I have to agree and call it art no matter how much it pains me to do so. Because what is art if it does not inspire some kind of emotion in the audience? They really did take me away from myself while I was listening and that is a rare thing to find anymore. What people called "shock rock" in the nineties is really laughable when you put the monstrosity that is Throbbing Gristle in to perspective. Marilyn Manson burning a flag and ripping up a Bible is naught but teenage angst (sorry Brian, you know I love you.). I never understood what was so shocking about such things and I always figured it was because I was at the right age to be desensitized. But then I found the grandparent of all depravity. It overjoys me to know that emotions are so strong. There's something to be said about the art of taking people to their limits. Psychological art.

By the way, I take much solace in the thought that me calling it art probably negates the artistry in their eyes. 

Anyway, listen of you're brave. Watch Genesis do their hour-and-a-half-long interview about how it all happened sometime. It's great.

Cabaret Voltaire is next on my list of things to discover. I hear they are similar. Sounds like a jolly good time.

 

Slug bait...ca-ca-ca-cahhhn't waaait...

Song of the Moment - Siouxsie and the Banshees / Israel

This is my absolute favourite Banshees song...of the moment.

I'm not really very big on songs with 9pm news meanings (that's just me being honest) but, regardless of the 9pm news feel I may have gotten at first glance, this is not one of those songs. Firstly, the lyrics are more of a general portrait than they are a current event. A beautifully sad portrait. That's important, I think. But, more importantly, when it comes to music, this song is one of the best examples I've ever seen of the bass and lead guitar being in a faithful and committed relationship. I love a song that starts with a few measures of bass and then teases for another 20 seconds before the riffs kick in.

Siouxsie's voice is, as always, haunting and gorgeous. But I love the way she seems to echo out of a cave in this one. The cave where the bass and the lead have made a home together, of course.

And, as usual, it wouldn't be song of the moment unless the drums made my shoulders bounce. Every instrument works here. Even the voices. The use of male and female voices together in that kind of haunting religious hum really brings the darkness of this song together.

Love it.

I'll put in live footage as well, but this song isn't really my favourite live. So the studio version comes first. But, in case you're wondering or somehow don't know already, yes, that is Robert Smith of The Cure on guitar in the live version.



Even though we're all alone, we are never on our own when we're singing.

Why Peter Murphy is a Badass: A Beginner's Guide

A list of reasons why I find "the Gothfather" (if you can really call him that) relentlessly groovy:

• He was not a singer before the day he was asked to join a band. Just a tiny bit later, this happened:

• He has amazing vocal range. He can be singing high speed alto one second and then go hard bass the very next. (Skip to the 4 Minute mark if you want to get right to my point.)

• He may have created mainstream creepy sexy.

• But he's not just an "erotic black spider." He's his own thing completely. He ranges from what many have dubbed as "goth rock" to eastern traditional music to '80s pop to soul. He has a lot going for him between "Béla Lugosi's Dead" and his most recent album Ninth.

• He has eyes like this (I'm not even sorry.):

 

• During one of Bauhaus' "Exquisite Corpse" experiments (not the actual song "Exquisite Corpse," but the song "1. David Jay 2. Peter Murphy 3. Kevin Haskins 4. Daniel Ash."), his contribution is about fish cakes. Take a fish...and a potato...smash it on the wall. Smash it on the wall. Stamp on the fish! This is how you make fishcakes... Like I said, he's not what you think he is. There's a sense of humour there that goes vastly overlooked.

 

• He likes to hang upside down when he performs sometimes. Even did a music video hanging upside down.

• He has a stammer that he deals with in the way he sings. That's where his enunciation comes from. What a gorgeous uniqueness. But, I might say that just because I have a thing for blue-eyed left-handed stammerers. 

• I wonder if Peter Murphy is left handed...

• He is left-handed.
  

• I admire anyone who has been with the the same person for longer than a decade. He and his wife met in 1982.

• He's David Bowie, Brian Eno, and Iggy Pop's three-way lovechild and, most importantly, to tell him this wouldn't surprise him.

• He went from Bauhaus to Dalis Car. He threw everybody with that move and I think it was wicked brave. And pretty good stuff as well.

 

• His solo work is completely different from all of the above things he's done. Because, like our previous badass, Paul Weller, you can't pin Peter Murphy down. You just can't.

• He's still doing it. He might have taken a few albums to do questionable world music, but so did Damon Albarn and we forgave him (I did anyway). Peter is back and he's just as good as ever. He's never lost that gorgeous voice.

So congratulations, Peter Murphy. You've been wonderful since the very beginning.

 And, we all have our problems.

I feel ya bro. 

I will climb this high wall in remembrance of Clancy...